Showing posts with label Style. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Style. Show all posts

Losing Your Hair? Here’s What to Eat


Losing Your Hair? Here’s What to Eat - A nutritionist from Japan said that men are less likely to be bald if they eat curry.

According to the site Rocket News24, Yoshiko Nakagawa claims that “the mixture of spices found in curry such as turmeric, saffron, nutmeg, and capsaicin are good for the body’s metabolism and blood circulation, which is known to encourage hair growth.” 

So could dishes containing this popular blend actually nip falling hair follicles in the bud?

“Curry powder, which is a mixture of spices including turmeric, can do many things, but there is no proven scientific connection with eating curries or curry powder and prevention of hair loss,” Jackie Newgent, RDN, culinary nutritionist and author of The All-Natural Diabetes Cookbook, tells Yahoo Beauty. 

While nutrition can have “a definite impact” on hair health, she explains that the food fixes for stronger locks stem from consuming a balanced diet, as opposed to one specific food or ingredient. 

“A pretty simple approach works best,” continues Newgent. “Obtaining the calories your body needs while eating a nutritionally complete diet—especially including adequate protein and iron—is the best defense for healthy hair.” 

Losing Your Hair? Here’s What to Eat

In fact, a study of more than 5,100 non-menopausal women published in the European Journal of Dermatology found that nearly 60 percent of the female participants who were affected by “excessive hair loss” were deficient in iron. 

To feed your hair from the inside, Newgent suggests focusing on “foods containing significant amounts of both protein and iron, including beef, clams, mussels, oysters, lentils, and beans.” 

She also points to another study (this one conducted by researchers from University of Kansas Medical Center), which concluded that one of the many side effects from vitamin D deficiency was hair loss. “So do get adequate exposure to the sun, as well as include vitamin D-packed foods in your diet, such as salmon, tuna, vitamin D-fortified dairy foods, eggs, and mushrooms,” adds Newgent. 

However, this doesn’t mean curry should be tossed from your spice rack. If anything, it’s quite the opposite. 

“Turmeric is a potent anti-inflammatory and there’s some preliminary evidence that turmeric, when consumed or used topically, may provide skin health benefits,” states Newgent. “So do enjoy curry for all of its many other nutritional—and cuisine—attributes!”  ( yahoo.com )
READ MORE - Losing Your Hair? Here’s What to Eat

More parents lenient about young web use


More parents lenient about young web use – Despite age restrictions on some social media sites, the number of U.S. parents who would allow children 10-12 years old to have a Facebook or MySpace account has doubled in a year, a new survey showed.

Seventeen percent of U.S. parents questioned in the poll said they had no problem with a pre-teen child using a social media site, compared to just eight percent a year ago.

And 11 percent of parents admitted to using social media sites on behalf of a young child or infant, according to the online survey of about 1,000 adults by Liberty Mutual's Responsibility Project.

"More and more parents are allowing their children to have a Facebook account or to have more online activity at younger and younger ages." said Janet Taylor.

The clinical instructor of psychiatry at Columbia University at Hospital in New York described the findings as a sign of the times.


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


"It's not alarming. I think it means we need to be aware of what is going on and how to best utilize social media," she added in an interview.

Most parents think that children under 18 should not be able to keep their account to themselves and a third monitor their usage. Forty four percent also limit the time spent on the Internet or texting.

Facebook, which has 500 million active users, was the most popular social network among adults in the poll. Nearly 90 percent used it frequently, followed at a very distant second by the professional website LinkedIn with 6 percent, Twitter and MySpace.

Although only three percent of people questioned said they used the microblogging site Twitter frequently, they had definite ideas about what was acceptable and what was not.

Nearly two-thirds thought it was unacceptable for the staff of celebrities and CEOs to ghost-tweet for them and 46 percent didn't think celebrities should use Twitter to argue with each other.

Twenty seven percent also did not agree with CEOs tweeting about their company.

Most Twitter users follow their friends and celebrities and tweet about their daily activities or current events. Only four percent tweeted about politicians or a religious leader, while 11 percent tweeted about their own achievements and 8 percent used it to criticize other people.

When questioned about cyberbullying, most parents said they thought it was their responsibility to resolve the situation if their child was a victim and 63 percent thought teachers and schools should be doing more to stop it. ( Reuters )

READ MORE - More parents lenient about young web use

Itching really can be contagious scientists prove


Itching really can be contagious scientists prove - Itching can be "caught" just by watching someone else having a good scratch, scientists have confirmed.

It is a phenomenon that can leave entire rooms full of people scratching at the merest mention of fleas or lice. Now scientists have proven for the first time that itching really can be contagious.

In a condition known as itch transmission, the researchers have shown that the sensation of an itch can be caught visually in the same way as yawning.

They found that simply watching a video of someone else scratching was enough to induce and intensify itching in volunteers.

Even when they were given a few drops of a liquid designed to induce itching on a patch of their skin, the volunteers tended to scratch more on random parts of their body.


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Researchers have shown that the sensation of an itch can be caught visually in the same way as yawning


Dermatologists at Wake Forest University School of Medicine in North Carolina believe itching becomes contagious because the brain becomes hypersensitive when someone nearby scratches and so misinterprets any kind of physical sensation on our skin as an itch.

Dr Gil Yosipovitch, who led the research which is published online in the British Journal of Dermatology, said: "Although it's a well-known sensation and dermatologists often feel itchy after seeing their patients scratch, contagious itch has not been studied systematically at all.

"Our results suggest there must be a central brain mechanism responsible for the generation of the itch sensation in the absence of itch stimuli. It is possible that sensory inputs from various regions, not specifically related to itch, may be wrongfully interpreted as being "itchy".

"It appears that there is low threshold for 'feeling an itch' when this suggestion appears in a visual form, or even by simply thinking/reading about it."

The researchers asked 25 volunteers to watch a series of five minute video clips that ether showed people scratching their left forearm or sitting idly.

They were either given a solution of histamine to induce itching on a patch of their skin or a few drops of harmless salt solution.

The volunteers tended to scratch twice as much when watching someone else scratching on the video compared to the video of the person doing nothing. The sensation occurred both in healthy volunteers and patients who suffered from atopic dermatitis.

The scientists also found that even when the histamine liquid was used, tended to scratch at other points in their body rather than just where the liquid had been applied.

Similar work in primates has also shown that monkeys can catch itches too and the researchers now believe contagious itching may be rooted in our evolutionary past as we evolved to live in close knit social groups.

Growing sensitive to itching when one member of the group is scratching could help to identify parasite infestations early and help to stop them spreading.

The scientists now hope to use their findings to develop new ways of treating people who suffer from chronic itching and skin diseases.

Dr Alexandru Papoiu, another of the researchers behind the study, said it appeared the mechanisms that create the sensation of itching was working "overtime" in these patients.

He added: "It is particularly interesting why humans are "vulnerable" or suggestible to cues of itch.

"If we can understand the underlying mechanism and its cause, we should have a better chance to treat itch, targeting the central nervous system stations involved."

Nina Goad, from the British Association of Dermatologists, said the study showed how much influence the mind could have on physical sensations.

She said: "This is a fascinating study looking at the power of the mind over a very physical sensation like itch.

"Many people can identify with the idea that watching other people scratch an itch leads you to feel the itch sensation yourself.

"To see this demonstrated in a clinical setting, with a view to developing treatments for common skin diseases like eczema that cause itch, is very interesting." ( telegraph.co.uk )

READ MORE - Itching really can be contagious scientists prove

Get in shape while learning self-defense


Get in shape while learning self-defense - Kicking and punching are great for boosting one's heart rate and toning muscles. But add some self-defense and street-fighting techniques and the adrenaline really starts to flow.

Krav Maga is the Israel Defense Forces' hand-to-hand fighting and self-defense system, taught to ordinary Joes and Janes who want to be able to handle themselves if attacked. This challenging, full-body workout will also get anyone in shape.


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Lead instructor Kelly Campbell, Rt, demonstrate a move against student Adrian Minor, in a Krav Maga self-defense class at KMW Training Center. (Ricardo DeAratanha / Los Angeles Times)


"With Krav Maga your focus is on defending yourself, so you're working out without realizing you're working out," says Marcus Kowal, general manager and instructor at Krav Maga Worldwide Training Center in West L.A., which has franchises across the country.

The good news is that there's no boot camp to weed out the couch potatoes. Everyone is welcome to learn the technique, Kowal says. "We work you at your level, and you'll still get a workout."

Since the objective is to "eliminate danger by any means necessary," according to Kowal, the focus is on becoming an aggressor when attacked, not a victim. Students learn to punch, kick, elbow and knee their way out of being choked, grabbed or threatened with weapons. It's a full-body workout with anaerobic cardio. "Everything we do is explosive, aggressive and high-impact but in a safe setting," Kowal says. An added bonus: All that pounding helps build bone density.

Focus is required, but staying calm is too, and students are taught to keep their cool in potentially violent scenarios. Although there is a belt system, they're not worn to class as with other forms of martial arts.

In a gym, Kowal says, it doesn't take long to become familiar with every piece of equipment. "If you want to get into shape, you need to sweat and get out of your comfort zone." ( latimes.com )

READ MORE - Get in shape while learning self-defense

Five holiday shopping traps to avoid:


Five holiday shopping traps to avoid: - Vital tips to stay on top of retailers’ gimmicks - Finding the right gift at the right price can be challenging, especially during the holiday season when deep discounts and door-buster sales abound. The latest issue of Consumer Reports highlights five traps holiday shoppers can avoid.

“Knowing how to navigate sales, comparison shop, and cut through salespeople jargon is half the battle to stress-free holiday shopping,” said Tod Marks, senior editor at Consumer Reports. “Shoppers need to take precautionary measures before purchasing gifts to make sure they are getting the right product, for the right price, with no strings attached.”


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Tod Marks, senior editor at Consumer Reports, says: “Shoppers need to take precautionary measures before purchasing gifts to make sure they are getting the right product, for the right price, with no strings attached.”


Five holiday shopping traps to avoid:


1. Deep discount come-ons


"Door-buster" sales promise big savings and not just on Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, or the following Cyber Monday, when shoppers go online. Consumer Reports found an electric percolator "on-sale" at Kohl’s stores and Kohls.com for $61.99, a discount from the regular $69.99. But those prices are higher than the $59.99 manufacturer’s suggested retail price. Retailers, especially discount stores, commonly sell below MSRP. Using a Web search, Consumer Reports found better deals. The best price was $30.03 plus $8.21 shipping at Salestores.com. – What to do? Comparison shop before buying and don’t worry about missing a sale, it’s likely that another one will come around before the season ends.


2. Gift card gotchas


New federal rules for gift cards limit issuers’ ability to charge certain fees and impose expiration dates. Inactivity and service fees can be charged only if a card hasn’t been used for at least one year. But issuers can still charge fees to buy cards, as they do for bank-issued variety, those that bear a credit-card logo. For example, expect to pay $3 to $7 for an American Express gift card. Also, gift cards are not protected if an issuer goes bankrupt. If that’s the case, the card could be worthless. Beyond that, many people never get around to spending their gift cards. A quarter of people surveyed by Consumer Reports in October 2009 who received gift cards the previous year said they hadn’t redeemed their almost one year-old cards – What to do? Give cash or a check. Cash never expires or loses its value, and is good anywhere. If the check is never cashed, the money stays in your bank account.


3. Extended-warranty pitches


Salespeople push service plans because retailers keep 50 percent or more of what they charge for them, but they are notoriously bad deals. Some repairs are already covered by the standard warranty that comes automatically with the product. Consumer Reports’ data shows that products seldom break within the extended-warranty window of coverage, when items do break, the repairs, on average, cost about the same as the warranty – What to do? Some credit cards automatically extend the manufacturer’s warranty on anything purchased with them, so check the card’s website. Even if the warranty expired, check with the retailer or manufacturer, which might choose or be legally obligated to repair and make good on a product that prematurely fails or otherwise shows signs of a defect.


4. Return-policy limitations


Some retailers relax their return policies during the holiday season, but don’t count on it and always learn the rules before buying. Some companies have different return policies for in-store, online, or mail-order purchases – What to do? Keep the receipt and let the recipient know the return policy. If the store provides a special gift receipt, include that with your gift.


5. Restocking fees


Many items, especially electronics and special orders, are subject to restocking fees that range from 10 percent to 25 percent if they are not returned in a factory-sealed box – What to do? Don’t open the package unless you’re sure you want the item inside. Items such as computer software, music CDs, and movie DVDs generally aren’t returnable if the seal is broken. If a fee is charged, try to negotiate a partial refund, but never pay a fee if the item is defective. ( msnbc )

READ MORE - Five holiday shopping traps to avoid:

Lady Gaga follows up meat dress with 'prime rib' speech


Lady Gaga follows up meat dress with 'prime rib' speech - Lady Gaga has spoken at a rally in support of repealing the Don't Ask Don't Tell laws that prevent gays and lesbians from serving in the military by saying that "equality is the prime rib of America" and everyone should have the right to wear a "meat dress".

The pop star Lady Gaga visited the state of Maine ahead of a key Senate vote to urge its two US senators to help repeal the military's ban on gays serving openly.

More than 2,000 people attended a rally at Deering Oaks Park, where the Grammy Award-winning singer stood alongside Air Force, Army and Marine veterans who were discharged because of the policy, which prohibits service members from revealing if they're gay and recruiters from asking about people's sexual orientations.

Lady Gaga railed against what she called the injustice of having goodhearted gay soldiers thrown out of the military while straight soldiers who harbour hatred toward homosexuals were allowed to fight for their country.

She began her speech by saying, "My address to you today is called "The Prime Rib of America."

She added that by shunning homosexuals the US military doesn't "get to enjoy the greatest cut of meat my country has to offer".

Lady Gaga made the "Prime Rib" address little over a week after she wore her now infamous "meat-dress" to the Music Video Awards ceremony.

Gaga continued: "Shouldn't everyone deserve the right to wear the same meat dress that I do? Repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell' or go home.

She added: "I am here to be a voice for my generation. Ultimately the law is being enforced by using gay profiling and gay soldiers have become targets."

The singer said that the policy was "unjust" and against everything Americans stood for.

Lady Gaga, famous for such hits as "Bad Romance," "Paparazzi" and "Poker Face," skipped her trademark outlandish outfits in favour of a black suit and a pair of glasses.

At last week's VMAs, where she won eight awards, she was escorted by ex-servicemen who were discharged or left the military as the result of the "don't ask" policy.

The rally was organized by Washington-based Servicemembers Legal Defense Network. The organization is trying to pressure Republican Sens. Olympia Snowe and Susan Collins of Maine to vote to allow a repeal of the so-called "don't ask" policy, put in place in 1993 by former President Bill Clinton.

The House of Representatives has approved a defense authorisation bill that includes a repeal of the "don't ask" policy.

In the Senate, Democrats need 60 votes on Tuesday to help pass the bill. ( telegraph.co.uk )


READ MORE - Lady Gaga follows up meat dress with 'prime rib' speech

“What I Learned About Sex After 50”


When you’re in your 50s and back on the dating scene, you quickly realize that the rules of lovemaking aren’t exactly the same as they were when you were first dating. While you may fear that the old gray mare just ain’t what she used to be, you might be surprised to find out that there can be some incredible in-bed benefits to being a bit more seasoned. Below, men and women share their revelations of how sex can be an entirely new experience over 50.


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Slowing down is sensual

“When I was younger, I hated hearing about how it takes you longer to respond sexually as you get older... but now that I am older, I realize it’s a blessing. I think it’s especially true that men feel this slowing down more than women... but that just gives them more time for foreplay, and I for one am not complaining about that!” – Deborah, 52, Great Neck, NY Lights out!


“When you hit 50, gravity’s begun to work on your body. I think that as a result of this, some of us are a little less inclined to feel comfortable with our bodies, or at least to the same degree that we were in our younger years. Because of this, I found that a dimmer switch is a really great thing to have until you and your partner get comfortable with one another. ‘Mood lighting’ just helps take the edge off things!” – Mark, 57, Thousand Oaks, CA


More experience means everyone’s happy!


“I actually enjoy sex a lot more than I did back when I was younger. Because I’m more experienced now than I was then, I am more attuned to what it is that I like. I’m also definitely more skilled than I was when I was less experienced, so I guess my partners are more thankful than they were back then, which also makes it a more enjoyable experience for me.” – Sharon, 55, Waco, TX


The butterflies don’t go away


“I’ve learned that even though I am much older than I was when I was first sexually active, I still have all of those nervous feelings before getting into bed with someone, and I still wonder about the same things: will I be good, will he be good, will the sex be good? It’s funny how that giddy nervousness still crops up, but that’s part of the thrill, I guess!” – Carole, 56, New York, NY


Creativity counts


“You know the phrase, ‘There’s more than one way to cook a chicken’? Well, when you’re in your 50s and have been having sex for quite some time, you’ve kind of gone through all of the recipes, if you catch my drift. Therefore, you kind of have to get inventive or it can get old. I’ve been pleasantly surprised to find out that the women I date are as into trying new ‘recipes’ as I am. I guess you sort of have to or sex can get really predictable.” – Robbie, 52, Coral Springs, FL


Buh-bye, birth control


“As most of the women I date have gone through menopause, the issue of getting one of them pregnant isn’t there, which is a huge relief! I used to be so consumed with worrying about that when I was sexually active in my 20s and 30s. Not having to be concerned with it now is great; being able to have sex without that cloud of worry hanging over your head makes sex a lot more enjoyable, I think.” – Bart, 59, Henderson, NV


You can be Mrs. (or Mr.) Robinson


“This may sound silly, but I have been dating some younger men over the last couple of years, and it is very exciting to know that they are interested in being with an older, more ‘experienced’ woman... that I can teach them a thing or two in the bedroom. I have spoken to some of my guy friends and they have had the same sentiments about dating younger women. Maybe it’s all the Hollywood imagery we’ve been exposed to, but there is something that’s a real turn-on about that situation. It’s made me feel very strong and sensual and in control. I highly recommend it!” – Juliana, 58, St. Louis, MO ( msn.com )


READ MORE - “What I Learned About Sex After 50”

Want happy children?


Want happy children? Spend less time trying to be perfect parents and prioritise own relationship instead, says bookCouples who want to raise happy and successful children should spend less time striving to be perfect parents - and instead try to be perfect spouses.

Family therapist David Code has claimed that children become demanding and dissatisfied if parents obsess over all aspects of their lives.

He argues that the 'greatest gift' you can give a child is to set them an example with a healthy, happy marriage.

Kirsty Young with her husband Nick Jones

Kirsty Young with her husband Nick Jones: Young said 'cult' of pushy parenting 'sickened' her because it was 'the real modern disease'


The ideas in his book To Raise Happy Kids Put Your Marriage First, are the latest salvo in a fiery debate over child-rearing.

The TV and radio presenter Kirsty Young recently said the 'cult' of pushy parenting 'sickened' her and was the 'modern disease'.

Meanwhile psychologist Dr Madeline Levine criticised 'helicopter' parenting - where parents 'hover' over their children's every move - for contributing to depression and anxiety.

Their conclusions appear to be reinforced by the U.S. therapist's book, which says children suffer from having too much attention.

'Today's number one myth about parenting is that the more attention we give our kids, the better they'll turn out,' said Mr Code, who also writes for the Wall Street Journal.

'But we parents have gone too far: our overfocus on our children is doing them more harm than good.

MODEL RELEASED - YOUNG BOY BEING HELPED WITH HIS HOMEWORK

Devoted parents do not necessarily produce happy children, Mr Code argues in the book To Raise Happy Kids, Put Your Marriage First (posed by model)


'Families centred on children create anxious, exhausted parents and demanding, entitled children. We parents today are too quick to sacrifice our lives and our marriages for our kids.'

He added: 'A good marriage sets a great example for your children's future relationships, and that's win-win for the whole family.

'By killing ourselves to provide a perfect, trauma-free childhood for our children, we're wasting our energy.

'The greatest gift you can give your children is to have a fulfilling marriage yourself.' Mr Code said parents make two main mistakes when they put their children first.

'First, it becomes harder to respect and enforce the boundaries that shape a child's character, so he simply badgers his parents until he gets his way.


Bad Mother and proud

Bad Mother and proud

'Future bosses and spouses may not be so patient with this behaviour. Second, we put tremendous pressure on our children to fulfil our emotional needs, which may lead to the child acting out.

'What had been a molehill becomes a mountain, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy that can cripple the child's development.'

'This draws even more attention to the problem, as parents seek a diagnosis and physicians increasingly rely on medicating children.' But parents who admit they put their marriages first risk public censure.

Author Ayelet Waldman triggered fury after admitting in 2005 she loved her husband more than her children.

Miss Young made her comments in the Radio Times ahead of her BBC TV series The British Family. She said: 'I think people these days are preoccupied with children as an extension of their own success.

'So we try to funnel them into all these areas of achievement: the Chinese lessons or the Kumon maths - the whole Baby Einstein thing.

'I think that's the real modern disease.' ( dailymail.co.uk )


READ MORE - Want happy children?

Bathtime healing


Bathtime healing. Most of us think catching a cold in winter is inevitable. Yet a simple daily ritual - a warm bath before bed - is one of the best ways to ward off infection, says leading naturopath Cornelis Van Dalen.

'Bathing in water a couple of degrees above body temperature activates the body's defence system against germs and viruses,' he explains.

'The warming effect of being submerged in hot water for around 30 minutes is like replicating a mini temperature rise - which is the body's natural mechanism for beating infection.'

Common viruses, including many of the 200 strains which cause colds and flu, die in temperatures just a few degrees above 37c, our normal healthy blood temperature. So soaking for around half an hour a day in a hot bath can easily nip a cold in the bud.

Although you can bathe at any time of day, it is better to do so at night, and to follow it with sleep, which is when cells and tissue renew themselves. For effective hydrotherapy, it is best to have a thermometer.

Avoid very hot baths if you have high blood pressure, angina, heart disease or diabetes, or if you are pregnant.

BEAT THE FLU

Run a deep bath to a temperature between 37c and 40c (98f and 104f), add a cupful of Epsom salts or Dead Sea salts (available at most chemists) and wallow in the water for 30 minutes. Drink a pint of fresh cold water while you are in the bath. Afterwards, simply wrap yourself in loose, warm clothing and go to bed. The virus should be gone by morning.

STRESS BUSTER

Run the bath to a relaxing temperature of between 34c and 36C (93f and 97f). Add one cup of Epsom salts and five drops of lavender oil. After 15 minutes of soaking, slowly add cold water and lower temperature to 15c (60f). Soak for another ten minutes. A cold compress around the head while you are in the bath reduces exhaustion and even headache.

ANXIETY DIP

A soothin mixture of basil, rosemary and mandarin oil balances the emotions, restoring peace of mind. Run a deep bath to a comfortable temperature (37c) and bathe for about 15 minutes. Don't let the water get hotter than this as a very hot bath can cause the heart to race, heightening feelings of anxiety.

ARTHRITIS SOAK

Boil a thumb-sized piece of sliced ginger root in a cup of water for five minutes. Steep for 30 minutes, then strain and pour into a bath of between 36c and 39c (97f and 103f). Bathe for 20 minutes.

INSOMNIA CURE

Run a deep, warm bath (34c/93f), adding two drops each of clary sage, lavender and basil oil. Add two tablespoonfuls of sweet almond oil and soak in the bath for around 20 minutes. When you get out, mix three drops of lavender oil with a tablespoon of sweet almond oil and massage into the body. Wrap up warmly and go to bed.

ENERGISER

Fill the bath with cold water (16c/60f) to a depth of about 10in (25cm). Add five drops of rosemary essential oil. Lower yourself gently into the bath and swish water all over your body for about a minute, then dry yourself vigorously. ( dailymail.co.uk )


READ MORE - Bathtime healing

Living with a sex-addict?


Living with a sex-addict? . When Simran started dating Rohit, she found him to be an aggressive, but a fun-to-be with lover who did everything to rock her sex life in bed.
But by the time they ought to speculate marriage, she realised that he wasn't a normal man with normal sexual desires.


Rather, he was a sex-addict, whose wild sex etiquettes and voracious hunger for physical intimacy was having a negative impact on their life together. Failing to cope up with his overtly insatiable sex drive, known to the world as ‘Satyriasis’ or ‘Don Juanism’, Simran had no option but to part ways with her beau.

Even for males, there's a chance that you maybe hooked to a 'nymphomaniac', who appears as - 'a loving girl for you' in the beginning. But by the time her 'sex-kitten' avatar comes to the fore it's already too late to pull up your socks. Dr. Sameer Parikh, a psychologist, defines sex addiction as a situation, "When having sex is seen as one's sole priority, leading to a neglect of the other important facets of life (e.g., working, socializing, and sleeping), an addiction or compulsion to sex. Sexual addiction and compulsivity include, any sexual behaviour which is "had" or done in an obsessive, uncontrollable, and/or irrational way that becomes self-destructive. People with this diagnosis feel, and indeed may have, little or no control over sex, and are required to go through psychological therapies and medication in some cases."

So, before you get into involved with a sex maniac, here are a few cues to help you know if you are clinging onto a sex addict or a nymphomaniac. However, remember that these are just cues and not a yardstick to make or mar your relationship.


Is she addicted to sex?


He's a sex-addict if ...

1. Normal lovemaking session? Not for him!
He usually complains about the lack of variety in his sex life with you. Normal love making sessions never satisfy him as he demands hard core porn-star type moves and grinds. He finds bliss in numbers, be it the number of abnormal sex-positions or the number of times he wants to climax in a single night...all hinting towards his out-of-control sexual problem.

2. He's leading a double life
Do you doubt he's having a liaison with someone else only to seek sexual gratification? Do you feel cheated in his company? Does he hide his 'self-help' acts from you, only because he is going overboard with them? And despite repeatedly telling him, he simply can't control his sexual urges.

3. He constantly digs into sexual stuff
No, we are not talking about men who take pleasure in watching occasional porn or reading sex write-ups and looking at photographs, but a man who is pre-occupied with X-rated stuff even at times and places where it's strictly avoidable. It's only X-rated movies that he is interested in most of the times. If his browser history reveals out and out porn sites in chronological order and his mail box is filled with invitations from adult dating sites ...you have all the reasons to watch out for.

4. Sex on his mind!
In his diehard pursuit of sex or romantic relationships, he is neglecting his social, professional and spiritual responsibilities and development. Even the extreme fear of being inflicted by STDs is no hurdle in his sexual escapades...then you should know he's an addict.

5. He's a runaway guy!
Does he usually try to get away from you after having sex? When he desires, he wants a roller-coaster session but soon after it's over, he's filled with guilt of getting physically close to you. This sense of withdrawal is due to his awareness about the compulsive craving for sex which he fails to curb.

6. Legal troubles? Who cares!
You caught him talking over the phone in an indecent (sexually explicit) manner with someone. You get to know of some legal allegations against him for anything - ranging from having a romp at an illegal place or with someone like a prostitute or a minor. You might even find him engaging in offensive activities like voyeurism or exhibitionism. If even the prospects of getting into legal trouble fail to stop him from exercising his sexual prowess, you should be aware that you are living with an addict!

7. He's getting cynical by the day
Together with the above mentioned clues, if you find your guy living with intense negative feelings of guilt, shamefulness and remorse, the extent of being suicidal, it's only because he can't stop himself from doing what he knows is wrong not just for him but also for his loved ones.

She's a nymphomaniac
if...


1. She's a spotlight hog
Nymphomaniac women need attention from more than just one person. She can go to any extent to be a man-magnet. So, beware if your partner is all over your friend, colleague, boss or any new male for that matter.

2. The world is sex-starved to her
That's the notion she lives in. To a Nympho, no one is oversexed, only undersexed! And she is the only one on planet Earth to satiate the sexual hunger of every sex-starved soul.

3. She's always in a relationship
Her past reveals one continuous series of relationships, overloaded with sexcapades. And the reason why she's never single is that she can't stand being alone.

Moreover, each one of her former boyfriends is stark opposite from one another, hinting towards the fact that she's not looking for that certain someone special, but for that certain anyone.

4. Sex, sex every where
No matter what you say to her, she will only decipher a sexual meaning or connotation from it to satiate her urges. She'll attach every thread of conversation with eroticism finally leading to sex.

Even your passive behaviour is no resistance to her over-charged self pouncing upon you.

5. Sex is a drug
Yes, to all her ailments, anxieties and problems the only medicine that works best is - sex. She just can't get over it. Knowingly most of the times, she fails to get over that compulsive compelling to get you into bed.

6. Too much, too soon
That's her expectation from the relationship and when we say this, we mean only her physical demands. While a normal girl is still happy with kissing and cuddling, she is already burning with a burning desire to be in bed with you...with her ruling the roost, of course!

7. Deny her and see!
Every man goes through certain 'low-drive' days, when he just fails to reciprocate his gal's passion and makes lame excuses for the next time.

But dare to deny a nympho and she'll touch the extremes of behavioural patterns, including a severe spat, depression and an acute sense of withdrawal from everything around her. Extreme suicidal tendencies will get more severe.

Expert advice:
"It is impossible for sex-addict themselves to realise the need of treatment for his state of being. In such a scenario, it is the prerogative of the other half to deal with patience and convince him/her to meet an expert for advice. Lack of treatment can not only expose the addicts to acute embarrassment, but also land them in legal troubles and wrong relations, especially in the case of women," explains physiatrist, Dr. Aruna Broota. ( indiatimes.com )

READ MORE - Living with a sex-addict?

Better Job Searching in a Recession


Better Job Searching in a Recession. Ryan Saale was in a bind. He was planning to move back to St. Louis from Santiago, Chile, earlier this year but, with the job market taking a downturn, it wasn't an ideal time to a start a job search -- much less from 5,000 miles away.

In preparation for the big change, he started doing freelance public relations for a large arts organization in St. Louis, while still in Chile. "Taking on the extra work was challenging, but freelancing for three months before moving helped get me revved up for job searching, building contacts and networking," Saale says. By trying a different approach to job hunting, Saale ended up finding a permanent position after a colleague on the freelance project recommended him.

"During a recession it is best to move forward with force, while your competition is moving slowly. It is easy to use the economy as an excuse," says Roberta Chinsky Matuson, president of Northampton, Mass.-based Human Resource Solutions. "Successful job seekers know that even in tough economic times, there are opportunities. You just have to dig a bit deeper."

If you are getting ready for a job search during troubled times, here are some tips from the experts.

1. Take a closer look at industry data

Research industries and job sectors that are experiencing worker shortages or still experiencing job growth. These are the areas where you may want to focus your search.

CareerBuilder.com produces a quarterly job forecast that indicates hiring manager trends for the next few months, both regionally and across major sectors. The Bureau of Labor Statistics releases updated figures every month on occupational job growth. For example, by looking at the BLS data, you will learn that health care, education, government, food services and drinking places, and IT categories have all gained jobs this year.

2. Freshen up your skills

"Don't give an employer a reason to pass you over because you don't know the basics," states Diane Morgan, director of career services at London Business School. Morgan says everyone should know basic office skills like Microsoft PowerPoint and Excel. "Since these are skills you can teach yourself from the Internet or a library book, there are no excuses for not having them."

Another alternative is CBInstitute.com, which offers easy-to-use online courses at all levels, including business etiquette, project management, foreign languages and typing. You can take courses at times that are convenient for you, so no matter how little time you have to invest, you can make it work. At the same time, the courses are affordable.

Morgan also suggests brushing up your sales skills (persuasion, negotiating and influencing) even if you aren't in the sales industry. You need to sell your best product, which is you, so make sure your personal pitch is relevant, timely and effective, she asserts.

3. Try part-time or freelance work.

"Rather than one 'job,' think in terms of multiple positions. Breaking in [to a new job] may be easier if you aim for part-time work within a company," advises Katy Piotrowski, career counselor and author of "The Career Coward's Guides." "Line up multiple part-time positions and you'll benefit from more job security; if one position evaporates, you have the others to fall back on." Moreover, it will pad your résumé and your wallet.

Rachel Weingarten, author of "Career and Corporate Cool," recommends job sharing or taking over for someone on maternity leave or during the holiday crunch. "A lot of people don't want to commit full-time skills to a part-time or temporary gig. In this economy though, it can allow you to not only try on a job for size, but to also improve your skills, impress a potential long-term employer and network like crazy with people in your chosen industry," she says. "Instead of nervously waiting for the right full-time career, you can potentially make something better happen in the short term."

4. Rev up your social networking

Gone are the days of peddling your résumé at anonymous networking events with watered-down drinks and goofy nametags. Now you can have countless opportunities with a few keystrokes and a couple of mouse clicks. Sure you've received those requests to join LinkedIn and BrightFuse, and you certainly use Facebook daily. (Scrabble anyone?) But now is the time to really take advantage of the network you've probably casually built over the years.

Networking is easier than in years past because of the easy access to your network and those of your friends and colleagues, Matuson declares. "Now you can go onto [social networking] sites and see who in your network knows someone at a company that you might be interested in working for. You can then ask them to make an introduction on your behalf."

5. Think in terms of results

"In today's recessionary environment, the single most important thing that a job seeker can do to advance his or her career is to demonstrate how they can build value for a company," says Wendy Enelow, author, trainer and career consultant.

"As we all know, past behavior is indicative of future behavior, so if you've been successful in growing sales, slashing overhead costs, improving profit margins on specific products, capturing new clients, etc., then clearly and prominently position those achievements within your résumé and other job search communications," Enelow suggests.

6. Role play

Practice your answers to interview questions -- especially the one that explains why you aren't working, recommends J.T. O'Donnell, a nationally syndicated workplace columnist. "If you were fired, or part of a layoff, you most likely are struggling to deal with this adversity. Role play with someone so you can get comfortable with your answer," she proposes.

"Confidence is key. You'll need to be able to explain the situation in a way that is authentic and sincere without sounding bitter or defeated. Try to stay positive and share what you've learned from the experience -- employers hire folks with good attitudes and the ability to handle adversity."

7. Polish your brand and market it

"How you choose to market yourself will directly impact how long it will take to find a new job," O'Donnell declares. "Identify your strengths and put together the best possible personal brand." You can do this with a flawless résumé, customized and compelling cover letters, and articulate and engaging networking.

"Searching for a job is the same in any type of market. You should be prepared, professional and do the work for the interviewer," Morgan says. "Don't make them guess or imagine how you could fit in -- that is your job ... If you can't make yourself relevant, your résumé will quickly be on the bottom of the pile."

8. Find opportunity in your current position

"New skills can come from a small part of your job that you most enjoy doing," Morgan declares. Ask your current employer to send you to a conference, pay membership dues or join an association.

You can also leverage dreaded tasks by seeking out ones that match a future interest, Morgan adds. "If you dream of running a nonprofit but are an operations manager, volunteer to run the community day for your company. A former law colleague is now the head of PR for a botanic garden because she leveraged her hobby. "

9. Be realistic

"Get real about the time it will take to find a new job," O'Donnell asserts. "In this current job market, I tell clients to expect it to take at least three months to find a job that pays $40,000. Add one month for every $10,000 more you want in salary. In other words, if you are looking for $80,000 a year, expect it to take at least seven months to find a new job." ( msn.com )


READ MORE - Better Job Searching in a Recession

Handling a Recession's Effect on Your Career


Handling a Recession's Effect on Your Career. In a recession, one thing is certain: Change is coming, especially as firms tighten their belts, reorganize, merge with other companies or close. Needless to say, preparing yourself for these types of transitions is crucial to your career success. Here are some of the changes you may experience during this recession and how to handle them:

New priorities

As organizations come to understand the new economic reality, projects that create immediate revenue will become the focus. So, a long-delayed product launch may immediately shift to the front burner. Since resources will be needed for these revenue generators, you may find yourself moved quickly onto new projects. Therefore, it's important you remain flexible and work with your manager to identify assignments that most impact the bottom line.

Added responsibility

Some companies may need to reduce head count while others may implement a hiring freeze. In either situation, remaining staff members will likely be asked to take on additional work. Some of these responsibilities may fall outside your normal role, so show a willingness to learn new skills. Your firm may even offer to subsidize training, so inquire with your manager about what the organization provides. In addition, identify tasks that can either be delegated or put on hold while you tackle any extra duties you've been assigned.

Internal moves

Companies that are set on filling open positions may decide to look internally to reduce the cost of recruiting new talent. That means there could be an opportunity for you to advance within your organization. If your firm does not have a formal process for posting internal openings, maintain a strong network of contacts within the organization so you can learn about vacant roles. Make sure your network includes individuals outside your department and at different levels of responsibility. Speak to your manager about specific positions that interest you; he or she can help you learn more about the job or provide support for your campaign.

More reporting

When finances are tight, managers need to take a closer look at how money is being spent. Don't be surprised if you're asked to provide detailed reports on how many hours a project takes and the cost involved. By carefully tracking that information, you'll be prepared should your boss request it. Also, look for ways to save the firm money or improve efficiencies. Being proactive with these types of recommendations will show your manager that you have a big-picture mind-set.

Fewer perks

Whether it's scaled-down celebrations, smaller bonuses or an end to free doughnuts on Monday, don't be surprised if some of the perks your firm has traditionally offered are sacrificed in an effort to reduce costs. Even if you've grown accustomed to these extras, don't let the changes negatively affect your mood. Understand that sacrifices need to be made in order to ride out this economic storm.

Layoffs

The unfortunate reality is that some businesses may need to let people go. No one wants to think about that possibility, but you should be prepared nonetheless, especially if you know that your firm is struggling. Make sure your résumé is current, noting how you've added value to your company, and increase your networking activities so you're ready should you find yourself suddenly forced to find a new position.

The current recession poses a number of challenges for not only job seekers but also those who are employed. Keep in mind, though, that the economic downturn can also present you with opportunity. Changes made within your organization may allow you to build marketable skills, take on new assignments or even prepare for future advancement. And by being flexible and open-minded, you'll demonstrate your ability to deal with any hurdle that comes your way. ( msn.com )

READ MORE - Handling a Recession's Effect on Your Career

Hundreds of Applications and Still No Job?


Hundreds of Applications and Still No Job?. Here's how every job seeker secretly hopes his or her search will go:

8:00 a.m. You see an ad for the job of your dreams: close to home, makes use of your skills, offers the right pay.

8:05 a.m. You apply for the job.

8:07 a.m. The hiring manager, out of breath, calls you. "We must have you. The CEO said to pay whatever you ask for -- we need you on our team ASAP!"

8:10 a.m. After you give your demands (a high salary and access to the company jet), you're faxed the job offer.

8:15 a.m. You head out the door to your first day of work.

In reality, the process takes a few weeks or months longer, and you probably won't get every single perk you want. Along the way, you don't hear back from the companies you think are perfect matches for you, and it takes weeks to get an interview after sending in your application.

You probably spend a few days (at least) wringing your hands over whether or not you'll ever find a job. No matter who you are and what industry you're in, anxiety is just part of the process. But everyone has a different breaking point, and after so many résumés, you're bound to start asking, "I've sent out hundreds of applications -- why isn't anyone hiring me?"

Here's a checklist for you to review so you can either put your mind at ease ("It's not me; it's them") or revamp your searching technique ("Well, it might be me"). Maybe the factors slowing down your job hunt are not under your control. But it doesn't hurt to double-check.

1. Location

Before you start blaming yourself for not getting any leads, take a look at your surrounding area. Not all cities have the same job market. A dearth of construction jobs in a northeastern suburb might be the polar opposite of the situation in a southwestern boomtown. Whether or not you want to or can relocate for your job is a personal matter, but you should consider the unemployment rate of your region when assessing how your hunt is going.

2. Which jobs

When you look at how many applications you've sent out and how many you've heard back from, you might want to divide the list into two columns: jobs you expected to get and jobs you applied for on a whim.

Many job seekers decide to send out applications for jobs they know they're not qualified for, whether they just want a paycheck or they think it would be fun to try a completely unrelated field -- even though they know the odds of getting a call are slim. These Hail Mary passes are perfectly acceptable, but don't consider their failures to be, well, failures. The jobs that align with your experience, education and skills are the ones that should be the gauge of your success.

3. The résumé

Here's where a lot of things go wrong. That one piece of paper, digital or hard copy, causes a lot of problems. Here's a quick rundown of what you should check:

  • Is your contact information (including your name) listed so the employer can call or e-mail you?
  • Did you target the content to the job posting? Use the same phrasing, list experience that correlates to the requirements and give specific examples of achievements that will intrigue the employer.
  • Did you attach the résumé as a document in an e-mail? For security reasons, many employers won't open attachments, so your résumé might go unread. In addition to the attachment, paste it in the body of the e-mail to be safe.
  • Was there a cover letter attached to it? No cover letter can mean no consideration for some hiring managers.

4. The interview

If you've been called in for interviews already, then you're doing something right. Not getting a job after interviewing doesn't mean you blew it -- it means you made the shortlist, but someone else might have been a better fit. But it never hurts to review your performance.

An interview is often a chance for the employer to see if you fit into the company culture. Are you too rigid for a casual environment? Are your verbal communication skills good enough for your position? Hiring managers also use this opportunity to learn about you in a way they can't through a résumé. They want you to elaborate on your experience and answer any questions they still have.

To make a good impression, preparation is key. You don't want to sound rehearsed, but practicing your answers to questions, your handshake, how you'll sit in the chair and anything else you're likely to encounter will help you. If you can avoid being the deer in the headlights, you'll be able to focus on the quality of your answers.

5. Appearance

Not to be superficial, but presentation means a lot. From the layout of your résumé to the wrinkles in your interview attire, your professionalism is being judged. How are you presenting yourself to employers?

Don't start your cover letter with, "Hey!" and don't end it with a smiley-face emoticon. Your résumé shouldn't be full of ClipArt butterflies and smiley faces. And you should leave some white space between sections so that the entire page isn't a single paragraph of text. The hiring manager needs to see a job candidate who takes the job seriously, even before you're called in for an interview.

During an interview, you should dress appropriately. That doesn't mean trying too hard -- say, a tuxedo for an administrative assistant's job -- but it does mean dress for the environment and look like you spent time preparing. If you're told the environment is business casual, then you don't need a suit, but you still need to iron your pants. ( msn.com )


READ MORE - Hundreds of Applications and Still No Job?

Use Your Age to Your Advantage


Use Your Age to Your Advantage. While it's true that not all employers will be gung-ho about hiring, or even retaining, older workers in the coming years, the overall statistics might well be on your side if you're 50 or older. The limited numbers of younger generations simply will not match the rising need for workers over the next 10 years.

This means that employers will be forced to look at alternate labor sources. Sure, they can outsource, further automate or contract their staffing ranks, but this will not suffice in all cases.

The plain fact is that you hold many advantages over your younger colleagues, but you're going to need to play your age to your advantage. If you have a few years under your belt, here are four tips to use age as an advantage in your job hunt:

Go on the offensive

Too often, older workers think they have to apologize for their years of actually working. Remind yourself that you're experienced, not old; you're seasoned, not over the hill; you're here and now, not history. It's all about spin and reframing, so drop the apologies.

You may be older, but you're not stupid and you're not dead. Use your savvy to sell against youth and inexperience. There are benefits to being older, like having wisdom, common sense and a long work record of accomplishments that you can translate into benefits to the employer. In other words, sell your track record. During the interview, take advantage of your successful work history and draw from those successes to meet the needs of the employer.

Sell results, not years

Realize that hiring managers today are looking for results, not years. Talk the language that an employer understands and appreciates: return on investment. Instead of citing 20 years of experience, identify the benefits to the employer and put them into monetary terms as much as possible. Back up your accomplishments with facts that are benefit-based. Sell them from the perspective of the result and how it benefited your present and previous employers.

Money talks and it talks loudly. Here's some good news: Money can trump age. As an employee, you either make money or save money for your employer. If the hiring manager doesn't see your value in one of these two categories, then you don't want to work for this company. In this recession, if the company isn't concerned about its bottom line, then it may not be around for long and isn't a viable option for you anyway. Get as close to money as you possibly can through the language of your accomplishments, and list them on your résumé.

Wear just one hat

While you may have accumulated experience in a number of areas, don't confuse the person reading your résumé with all the different roles and jobs you performed over the years. Focus only on the job title for which you're applying. Tell the hiring manager what he wants to know and nothing more.

Most likely you've worn many different hats during your career. If any of your duties and experiences don't directly address the job title's requirements, don't emphasize them. In fact, remove them from your résumé entirely, if possible, as they will only give employers another reason to screen you out, and you don't want that. This is your story. Tell it your way. Magnify only the aspects of your background that are relevant to your target objective. You want to focus your résumé to reflect yourself in the most positive, powerful ways possible.

Modify your résumé

Take another look at your résumé. Ask yourself, "Would I hire myself for this position?" Spin your story in your favor by reworking your résumé to emphasize your strengths. Make sure everything on it relates in some way to your desired job objective. Drop older job titles. You generally shouldn't need to show more than 10 years of work history. Any prior work is most likely irrelevant now and will take the reader off track. Remove obvious road markers, like dates. For example, remove college degree dates and other older professional training dates that may go back more than a few years.( msn.com )


READ MORE - Use Your Age to Your Advantage

The Full-Time Job of Finding a Job


The Full-Time Job of Finding a Job. Wouldn't a sabbatical from work be nice? An extended break to finally accomplish all those things on your to-do list: travel, go hiking, renovate the house, read the classics.

If you find yourself unemployed, very often the silver lining is that you have the time to do all those things you never could while working. But as many job seekers soon discover, lack of income and the need for a new job can hinder your recreational activities. After all, do you want to spend your savings on a trip to Europe if you don't have a job lined up?

If you're a job seeker, you can find yourself struggling to balance the demands of finding a new job and being tempted by your newfound free time. When you're checking job postings earlier than you ever showed up to the office, it dawns on you that a job search is its own full-time gig.

Why is it a full-time job?

You know job hunting is serious business, but just how long does it take to post a résumé online and make a few calls to your professional contacts? Not long, but stopping there would be a mistake. Today's job hunt is a combination of old-fashioned footwork, online brand building and reaching out to the right people, as Debbie Withers has learned.

She was a marketing director before she took some time off in 1997 to be a full-time mother. As her kids grew up, she began a freelance writing career and did marketing consultation. Her youngest child is about to be in middle school and she thinks it's the right time to renew her career outside of the home.

"What I've discovered is that it really is who you know," Withers says. As a job seeker who was out of the professional world for a while, Withers has to overcome the image that she wasn't getting any relevant work done during her freelance years. Not to mention the fact that her time off began once she moved from Virginia, where she had many contacts and a solid reputation. "Unfortunately, since I didn't work full-time [here] in the Atlanta market, I don't have the business contacts I had in the cities where I was a marketing director; no one in my current sphere saw me in that high-profile position."

Since beginning her job hunt, Withers says three things have stood out to her:

1. Connections matter

One of the other mothers at a play group was married to a cameraman in a broadcasthiring manager. When the company is hiring again, she has a direct line to the right person. company where she wanted to work. Although the company wasn't in a position to hire her right then, she did get the contact information for a

2. Don't waste any opportunity to sit down with someone

One of Withers' acquaintances passed her résumé along to a colleague in the marketing department of her company. She was able to sit down with the marketing person and present her portfolio. Although the company was in a hiring freeze, Withers says she doesn't see it as a wasted opportunity.
"At least now I've met the corporate contact face to face, and although they're not advertising openings, she'll be more likely to think of me when they need someone."

3. Give your résumé to the right people

Withers asked one of her former employers to be a reference and forwarded her résumé. A few weeks later, that employer introduced her to a business associate who is hiring for a position she has experience in. She doesn't know whether or not she'll get the job, but she's glad to know she has someone helping her find employment opportunities.

Technology's role

By now you know that technological advances have benefits and plenty of disadvantages. Your cell phone can save your life during an emergency, but it can also ruin your evening at the symphony with an ill-timed ring. Social networking sites have had a similar effect on job hunting.

Sites like Facebook, BrightFuse and Twitter allow you to connect to old friends, potential employers, past clients and other people who might offer career opportunities. But combine the sheer volume of social networking sites and the ever shrinking shelf life of timeliness -- you haven't updated your Facebook status in over two hours? -- and you can't walk away from the computer for too long. Michael Durwin, who was recently laid off because of the economy, is experiencing the full-time demands of a job search.

"I'm as busy, if not more busy, tweaking my personal brand, hunting down new freelance clients and job hunting," he says. With his wife expecting their first child in a month, Durwin thought the layoff would give him plenty of time to do some work around the house that he's been putting off. He was mistaken. "I'm constantly trolling through job sites, joining new ones, reaching out to contacts, hunting down client contact info [and] updating my blog and Twitter feeds."

Of course, you might not mind the need for constant updates when you consider how visible you're making your job hunt. Sure, all of your contacts on these sites can see your information, but depending on your network settings, people in your same city or alumni network can, too. More sets of eyes are coming across your availability for a job.

Time is money

The ability to stay connected can help your job hunt, but it can also add a sense of guilt to your daily life. Every free minute you spend relaxing can feel like a career opportunity slipping away -- a feeling Meghan Schinderle recently discovered.

"I was prepared to treat looking for a job like a job," Schinderle says. "I prepared to dedicate long hours to it and to put time and effort into searching and networking. What I was not prepared for was the feeling of guilt I would have for the times that I am not doing it -- and the feeling that I must be glued to my laptop working towards finding a job at all times. This is unhealthy, to say the least."

To maintain good mental health, Schinderle is taking a step back from her obsessive behavior. She's trying to take advantage of the free time she has, while still looking for a job.

"I am running at the beach in the mornings and cooking dinner with my boyfriend at night. I am going to the gym and running errands in the middle of the day or going to the museum right by my house," she says. "I am doing all the things that people who do have jobs wish they could. It's great to dedicate a significant amount of time to job hunting, but you have to get away from it for a little while every day or it will consume you and then depress you." ( msn.com )


READ MORE - The Full-Time Job of Finding a Job